anna

Archiving is something, that I always wanted to do, maybe because I like collecting things. But I'm really not good at it... All my attempts at building archives failed, so today, the idea that an archive does not have to be well-structured and efficient, was a nice discovery. It motivated me to continue collecting and adding things to my own messy and fluid archives. It also made me think of this text by Ursula Le Guin which is more about science fiction and storytelling, but there is this nice part about how collecting things in a bag is a human thing to do. Excerpt from p.151-152: "If it is a human thing to do to put something you want, because it's useful, edible, or beautiful, into a bag, or a basket, or a bit of rolled bark or leaf, or a net woven of your own hair, or what have you, and then take it home with you, home being another, larger kind of pouch or bag, a container for people, and then later on you take it out and eat it or share it or store it up for winter in a solider container or put it in the medicine bundle or the shrine or the museum, the holy place, the area that contains what is sacred, and then next day you probably do much the same again - if to do that is human, if that's what it takes, then I am a human being after all. Fully, freely, gladly, for the first time."

patient
playful
humorous
confusing

Watching Donna Haraway's documentary and reading and talking about making kin and about storytelling, Ursula's text keeps coming to my mind again and again and I like it more and more. It is also connecting to what I have unconconciously been trying to do for a long time with my artistic practice but haven't been able to put into words. Reading it was also a bit relieving, like a validation, to pursue refusing a linear story from A to B with a main hero. Picking up, collecting existing stories and modifying them, re-telling them in other ways. But also not giving in to the pressure of clearly defining and "concretize" myself and my artistic practice in order to conform to the art market, but to further confuse in a playful and humorous way and try to stay fleeting

I left class early today, because I was very sick of it. We were supposed to make tents and I was super ready for it, because I thought it would be fun. But it wasn't. Maybe because it was poorly initiated, maybe because of the other students, maybe because of me. But of course the same people that already know each other ended up working together, while others sitting awkwardly by themselves, scrolling on their laptops and waiting for class to pass. Besides of course those who wanted to work alone on a tent.
So I was pissed and left. But then I felt very bad (because I know I'm short-tempered) so I went to buy some glitter and wrapping paper at action and went home to work out what kind of tent I could make, that doesn't involve humans (because obviously I was sick of humans). It turned out to be a refuge for fairies, wannabe-fairies and all kinds of spirits that are tired of this bullshit. I also made some fairy-gold out of polymere-clay. My tent was finished, so on Friday (instead of building tents like everybody else) I went to do pottery. It made me very calm. When we presented all the tents I wasn't angry at all anymore and it kind of made happy, that everybody seemed to enjoy it, so I tried to enjoy it aswell.

Reading the chapter on feminism and crafting in "The Utopia of Ordinary Habit" was the perfect coincidence for me. Because literally the night before I had a zoom meeting with people I've worked on a publication with. The book is being printed right now and we're preparing a book launch. We got the possibility to use a small gallery space in Zürich, in a street famous for its night life. So in the middle of that busy street, we have a small room and we wanted to make it a comfortable and personal space, one that feels warm. That's the environment we'd like for that book, which is basically a collection of very personal stories connected to experiences with sexism. As a symbol of all these individual stories coming together, being weaved into and connected to each other, we thought of using yarn and wool to make big nets or knots, which we'd hang into the space. But because of the concern, it being too "crafty" we got away from that idea again, moving more towards a very minimalistic idea of displaying only the books as one big block. We ended up postponing the decision, because we all were unsure about it.

Reading the assignment I can't believe people actually wanted that to be more concrete and written out. Already the word assignment makes my brain open 100 error windows and refusing to work.

I wanted to experiment with ways of non-linear storytelling, so I worked on several ways parallel. One of them was collecting videos which I arranged into a collage. It resulted in 3 screen recordings called "SCHWESTA EWA" (which the still is of), "OHMYGOODNESSSILLYGIRL" and "MY LIFE IS A PARTY". I don't know yet if they are finished and I also don't know if I am confident enough to show them at the exhibition. Probably not. Another medium I continued that I already had started two months ago was my collection of sticky notes. I will distribute them in the Ijzerblok and also prepare some so that visitors can leave sticky notes, too. I also started transfering drawings I made during our classes on to 4 tiles I found on the street, but I don't like them much so I will not show them.

And finally I made a drawing with text, that tells the story of a dream that I dreamt on the 1st of December. The two pictures on the top left show the very first documentation of the dream, then on the top right a colour pencil version I started but gave up. The rest are pictures of how I tested the installation and the final installation at Ijzerblok where I found the perfect wall for it. I really hope that it is somewhat readible and also a little understandable (not too much, though). The work is called "TRUE STORY BASED ON A DREAM / STORY BASED ON A TRUE DREAM"